Me and Jenna were talking about the hunger games today and we were saying what we thought the people in the book actually looked like. This is what I thought

Katniss Emma Roberts

Enrique as Gael really any guy that was tanner and had a little bit of scruff and a rugged look to him

Sterling Knight as Peeta I was thinking a guy a little bit older but with this same basic look

Elle Fanning as Prim

Lenny Kravitz as Cinna That really spikey hair he does sometimes is what I pictured

some random as Effie. I just thought she would look more normal. Not so powdered and Ugly. More like an extreme normal person that was still pretty

Hagrid as Haymitch I thought of them pretty similar looking

President Snow

The middle picture of Taylor with red hair is what I imagined fox face to look like

The host but he would have blue Pauly D hair

This is off of looks alone because some of these people would play the characters well but some are not even close to what I imagined them acting like. This is just what I thought they looked like.

Well it's official, my little sister is married. First Jenna ran off and eloped and now Brooke is married to Andy. She has been planning this wedding for a few months so I was over it before it even happened. I love her, but weddings just aren't my thing. She was her typical diva self but didn't turn into bridezilla or anything. She had a small ceremony with just a few close friends and family. My niece did the flower girl thing. We were worried she would get nervous and not want to do it or that she would forget what she is supposed to do (she's only 3) but she walked out there full of smiles and did exactly what she was supposed to. The ring bearer (Andy's nephew) was a little nervous at first but once we told him to walk up to Andy he was ok. The ceremony went pretty well except Brooke practically ran down the aisle and then kept yelling "I do" before she was supposed to. The kiss seemed forever long to me. Then we got to eat lunch. I think everyone was really hungry because we were eating like it was the first meal we'd ever had lol. After that the boys went with Lexa and my other sister to trash both cars. I told them it was kind of early but no one listens to me. Since there was such a huge gap a lot of people went home but Brooke and Andy couldn't go anywhere because we saran wrapped their cars. Sucks for them. I took a nap because I'm exciting like that

The reception was more fun. A lot of people came that I haven't seen in a long time so I had fun talking to all of them. It was a little crazy though because Brooke didn't do a formal line so people who wanted to talk to us had to go find each of the siblings individually and we were scattered all over the room. I kept getting pulled in all directions to talk to people and take pictures and I got hugged a million times. There was all the typical wedding stuff cake cutting, bouquet tossing, garter throwing, and lots of dancing. I did pretty good not crying all day but then my grandpa went out to the dance floor and started dancing with Brooke and I almost cried. It was so cute. That's definitely a memory I'm going to keep. I didn't cry though, almost, but no. Then at the very end of the night they were cleaning up and I went to help Brooke change out of her dress. It was just us and she started talking about how weird it would be not coming home and being with me everyday. She brought up all these crazy times we had and I couldn't help it. I started to cry. Dang it! lol I love that my sisters are moving on to the next phase in their lives but I wont lie I miss them like crazy. Growing up we spent all of our time together and were all really close so its weird not having them around for midnight talks or to make silly videos in the living room. Getting ready every day was like a big production. We turn on the music and sing and dance and everyone gets cute and then we all want to go out because we know we look cute lol.... aww I'm going to miss them so much!

I get a lot of people coming on here for my stories about Vegas and Sarah and my porn days in general. I have a few posts I made on here but I ended up putting a lot of it on private because it was pretty scandalous for a blog that also talks about my friends and work and every day life. I decided I don't want to mix the two so I have another blog for all my sexual rants, raves, and musings along with my crazy life back in the porn industry. It's not what people would probably expect but it's still better to seperate the two. So if you like my celeb stories and sarcasm you have come to the right place. If you want the other stuff you'll have to head over there and add me. Everything is locked down because it's got an adult nature to it so you have to be my friend to read anything. Go read it if your curious I don't bite...hard lol

andisbedroomdiary.xanga.com

Peter Kwan

I woke up really early and couldn’t get back to sleep. I didn’t want to wake Ber up so I decided to take a walk. I met all kinds of people on the street. I jogged a few blocks with a guy named Craig who just got divorced. He is an actor but nothing big, and he hates LA. I met a prostitute that isn’t homeless but she sleeps on the street sometimes. She was nice but she has a huge drug problem. She is originally from Tennessee and grew up on a rabbit breeding farm. She wishes she were still there doing that. I met a ton of homeless guys from all over. Then this guy on a corner handed me a pamphlet and asked if I would say a prayer with him. It was early and I had nowhere else to be so I agreed to pray with him. I think he was a born again Christian. Anyway, we say the prayer and he tells me that now my soul was saved. What a great way to start your morning! So we start talking about religion and comparing and contrasting his and mine and then a Jewish guy (there are two synagogues on the same street as my hotel) joins in and we had a really interesting discussion about religion. I’m glad they were willing to be so open with me and talk about their beliefs. I learned a lot about the different religions that day. After a while I had to get back because I knew Ber would be awake and probably freak out. She said she woke up and I wasn’t there so she looked on the floor to see if I fell out of bed We raided the hotel breakfast counter and got some chocolate chip muffins. The lady at the front desk looked kind of surprised to see two tiny girls walking around with so much food lol

 The day seemed promising. It was nice and sunny again and when the guests started to arrive I was happy to see some familiar faces. I walked Dennis Haysbert and his manager through the lounge. We chatted, ate cupcakes,  and picked presents for his daughter. His manager never takes pictures but she agreed to take one with us which was nice of her. She’s way cool. After I took them through the lounge I walked them out to the gate where his car was waiting. I’m really weird when people make any physical contact with me if I’m not expecting it. Dennis starts getting closer to me and I thought he was going to shake my hand like most people do. I was caught off guard when he pulled me in for a hug so I kind of resisted. Then I hugged him and started to pull away but he pulled me back and kissed my cheek. I leaned away and gave him a really weird look. Then after a pause I kissed his cheek back. So I start to lean away again and he pulls me back and kisses the other cheek. He smiled and said “Have to even it up.” But by then I’m just a total awkward mess so I just air kiss and apologize for my lack of LA finesse. Then I say I’m too Utah for my own good and turn to walk away. BAM! I fell right on my face. Ugh lol add that to the list of embarrassing moments in front of a celeb. I never make it through an event without at least one. After that we started seeing helicopters in the sky again and I was hoping it was just media trying to get footage of the lounge but it wasn’t. There was another shooting so they shut everything down. No one could go in or out which meant our guests couldn’t get in to the lounge. That part sucked because we missed a lot of people that wanted to get in. After work we got invited to dinner with ator/director/producer Peter Kwan. He took us to this place called Kabukis. It’s Japanese food and it’s really good! I don’t eat sushi so I was worried I would have to starve but they had sesame chicken so I got that. <3 It was so yummy! At dinner we got onto some really weird topics like the Donner party, drugs, and polygamy. It was pretty random but it was a lot of fun. After dinner we were debating whether or not to stay another night but we all wanted to get to Vegas so we could stay the night and play the next day. We ended up leaving dinner and getting straight on the road.

Right when I got home I had to jump right in to Brooke’s bridal shower, then we did a bunch of stuff for the wedding (I swear I have made enough chocolate mints to last me a lifetime), there was a surprise funeral, and then of course the bachelorette party…it’s just been non-stop busy the past few weeks.

Kayla and Ber at the step and repeat wall

We got to work just as all the trucks were getting there unloading gifts for the celebs. The lounge was at the Pickford Mansion which is where The Artist was filmed. It is a gorgeous property! We were really excited because it was a nice sunny day which was a huge contrast to the snow we had left behind at home the day before. I was still feeling kind of sick so I had to sit down a lot which wasn’t all that fun but oh well. Before work they had us go eat. The catering at these lounges is delicious! Then the celebrities started arriving. We had a lot of Disney kids which was fun. They have so much energy and really big personalities. It was a pet lounge so people brought their pets. It was interesting to see which pet matches up with which person. We had big fluffy retrievers, poodles with hair like pebbles Flinstone, and even a pug with a purple Mohawk. I spent a lot of time with the lounge hostesses dog Cruiser. He is a big white lab. I think he was a little grumpy because he’s the spokes model for fur fitness which helps people get their obese pets to a healthier weight. I don’t think he was too happy about his new diet lol He kept trying to eat the cookies off the table. When work was over everyone kind of went their separate ways because we all wanted to do different things.

I went with Ber, Jon, and Kayla to this little mall to get food. We could hear all these sirens in the distance but I just thought big cities always sound like that. We went in and ordered our food, then sat down next to the door since they left it open to let the breeze in. The windows were floor to ceiling across the whole front of the store so we could see everyone walking around outside. All off a sudden we hear a bunch of police sirens really close to where we are and helicopters are flying overhead like a swarm of bees. We were going to go outside to see what was going on but we didn’t even get more than 2 steps out the door before a bunch of gun shots went off. There were so many shots right in a row that we thought it was an automatic. People started screaming and running like it was Armageddon and we freaked out thinking maybe some terrorists were shooting up the mall or something. Everyone ran back in the store and the workers all ran to the back. People were hiding under the tables. A guy closed and locked the doors so we were all locked in. It was kind of scary. After a minute things calmed down so we went back outside and across the street we could see all the cops standing around a car with a bunch of bullet holes in it. We didn’t see any body so we thought it might have been a drive by but then we walked a little toward the car and we saw the body laying on the ground. Ber hates dead bodies so it made her kind of sick. We lost our appetite after that so we just went back to the hotel and watched the Lakers game/youtube videos and went to bed.

Ashley looking cute by the pool. I love her shoes

Utah crew and Dre

Well Valentines Day was good. I made some money and got cards from my sweet friends and fam. A few fans sent me some adorable stuffed animals and flowers. I got spoiled yet again and I didn't deserve a single bit of it! Thank you to everyone that did that. It was really sweet of you guys. I always want to post pictures when I get presents but then I never do it because I don't want people to feel like I'm rubbing it in. I don't know, is that weird?

Alexa and my niece both had their birthdays. Lex got a new car and she is in love with it. She went out of town for her birthday so we are going to do a big party for her when she gets back. We got my neice a car for her birthday too but since she is only 3 it was a princess power wheel car I had to leave directly from her birthday party to pick up the step and repeat wall because we were taking it to LA for the Oscars lounge. It feels like we just finished the event wrap up on Sundance and it's already time for the Oscars. The drive to LA was a disaster!!! It was such a horrible experience that I really don't want to talk about it ever again. We got to Camarillo where I was staying for the night and I was WAY tired but our hosts wanted to chat so I had to turn on the charm even though I just wanted to crawl into bed and hibernate. They were really nice though. They showed me their motorcycles and we talked sports. The Lakers game was on and they wanted Dallas to win. My team won They had a super cute little fluff ball of a dog named Bentley that wanted to cuddle up on my lap and kept trying to play. They made a bed for us in the dining room which was a little strange considering they literally pulled a bed out and put it under the chandalier where a table would go but I was too tired to care. I would have slept in the bath tub at that point. Everything has been really hectic the past few weeks and I feel bad because I left Brooke right in the middle of planning her wedding. I have her bridal shower the day I get home so I have to hit the ground running. When did my life get so busy?!

I joined a writing blog for fun because I really want to get some practice. Every week they post a new topic and we all write stories and submit them. This one is my first submission. I had a deadline and I had to crunch a story that was much longer into a condensed version so I feel like it's pretty weak, but I am hoping I'll get better with time. If any of my subscribers are writers or would like to join the blog let me know and I'll get you the details. This story topic had to be about Love and death. Here is my story

IT WAS JUST A DREAM

Light streamed in through the window of the empty bookstore. Annie loved working in the silence. Outside she could see people rushing by on the busy streets. Cars, sirens, dogs barking…all the noises of the outside world were drowned by the silence in the bookstore. It was her own personal sanctuary where she could watch the world from a safe and peaceful distance. It was always slow in the morning so it gave her time to let her mind wander while she cleaned or read books that would take her mind to somewhere else completely. She needed that serenity and she clung to it like a life preserver. It had been two years since Collin had passed away in a car accident, but the pain was still as intense as if it had happened yesterday. She knew that she would never love anyone else the way that she loved him. The quiet tranquility of the bookstore had helped her to manage her feelings and get to a place where she was finally able to start living her life again. She picked up a worn copy of The Great Gatsby and began to read where she had left off the day before.

She read until the early afternoon when a gentleman came through the door. “Good afternoon” he said, “Would you happen to have a copy of Walden on hand?” “I think we do” Annie replied, “Let me check the back.” While she was out of the room she heard the bell ring as someone else entered the store. She quickly found the book she was looking for and started back to the front to ring the gentleman up. As soon as she stepped into the doorway she dropped the book in shock. Her heart began to race and she felt like she couldn’t breathe. “Miss? Are you all right?” the man asked her as he retrieved his book from the floor. She didn’t even hear him. “What?” she gasped. She thought this must be some cruel hallucination her heart had conjured up. It had to be. Collin was dead. His mother had called sobbing and broke the news on that horrible night, years ago. Annie had seen the car when she went with Kelly to clean it out. It was totaled. There was broken glass where the rescue team had to break the window to get him out. There was blood on the seat and on the steering wheel where he had hit his head. The image was burned into her brain. There was no way that the person standing before her could really be him. The silence hung heavily in the air as she stared at the stranger and he just stared back. The old man looked from Annie to the young man in confusion, set his book down, and quietly left. “Annie it’s me.” Collin said softly. He took a step toward her as if he wanted to hug her but then changed his mind and stood still. It felt like the pain she had been bottling up in her heart had been set free. It tore through her body and she felt like she was losing him all over again. She had wanted to forget him and now she wanted so badly to believe he was here but she knew there was no possible way that could be true. She burst into tears. Collin immediately rushed forward to hold her in his arms like he always had before. She wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face into his chest sobbing. He rested his chin on her head and held her. As she listened to his heartbeat as she had so many times before she knew this was real. He was real and she was his.

“How did you… what happened?” She asked, pulling away from his body enough that she could see his face. She had so many questions that she didn’t know where to begin. “I’m really sorry Anne. I never wanted to hurt you and neither did my mom. I don’t remember everything that happened that night. The last thing I remember was that I was on my way home and another car started swerving over into my lane. I tried to get out of the way but he hit me and then it went black. When I woke up I was in the hospital and I had no idea how I got there. Mom was waiting by the bed and she started to cry when I woke up. She told me I had been in a coma for a really long time. They didn’t know if I was going to come out of it. The doctors told her they weren’t sure if I was going to make it and that even if I did I might not be the same. She loves you like a daughter Anne. She didn’t want you to put your life on hold for me and she knew you would. So she told you I didn’t make it.” Annie felt anger starting to boil up inside of her “Why would she do that?!” she asked. “I’m here now.” He said apologetically. Looking up into his eyes Annie couldn’t stay mad. How many nights had she spent praying to god to bring Collin back for her? How many times had she wished he would hold her just like he was doing now? She didn’t want to re-live the nightmare of the past. It was over now and she didn’t want to spend her time being angry. She put her cheek back onto his chest again, breathing in deeply and smelling the familiar sent of his cologne. “I’m taking the day off then.” She sighed happily.

Being with Collin was everything that she had remembered it to be. The went to the gas station and bought slurpees just like they had done every Friday afternoon the summer they first met and they sat on the curb out front making up stories about the strangers walking by. After that they spent hours walking through her neighborhood. She felt so comfortable walking hand in hand with him down the familiar streets and talking about things as if he had never left. When they got to the honey suckle bush he picked a flower and popped the honey suckle into his mouth. She made a face as if she was disgusted but she ate one too. He pulled another flower from the bush, put it behind her ear and with a wink told her to save one for later. She couldn’t help smiling at his sarcasm. They went to the school where they had spent so many summer nights together back when she was younger and she had to sneak out to see him. They played Frisbee and wrestled in the grass. It didn’t matter how much they had grown since those first nights together they never stopped playing like that. She laughed as they rolled in the grass and she tried to pin him so she could steal the Frisbee from his grasp. He had that mischievous boyish twinkle in his eye and he laughed at her failed attempts. She hadn’t laughed since the accident and it felt great, like stretching after having been asleep for a very long time.  She finally gave up on trying to get the Frisbee and laid down next to him.

“Which one is Pegasus again?” she asked him as they lay in the grass looking at constellations. He knew all of them and he would point them out to her. This had been something they had done before the accident. Sometimes they had just made out til their lips were numb because they liked doing that too.Really, it never mattered what they did she just like to be with him. He held his arm out for her and she curled up against his side with her head on his shoulder. Her favorite place to be is in his arms. He held her while he kissed her and she got this dizzy happy indescribable feeling. Everytime she kissed him she got butterflies and it was hard to catch her breath but no matter how dizzy she got she never wanted to stop kissing him. As they cuddled in the grass with her head on his chest she fell asleep to the sound of his heart beating.

She felt the sun on her face before she opened her eyes. She didn’t think she could have ever felt this much bliss again. She stretched happily and rolled over to give Collin a morning kiss. Her hand fell where his chest should have been and instead she just felt the cold emptiness of the bed. She sat up and for a second she was alarmed. Then it started to sink in. She hadn’t been to her old neighborhood in years. The laughter she had heard so vividly last night was just an echo of a memory. It had been a dream again. A beautiful dream, but she was alone. Collin really was gone and he wasn’t coming back. The dreams were just her hearts way of trying to get back the piece it was missing. She knew there was no way he could have survived the accident. That was just something she wanted so badly to believe. Tears fell down her cheeks as she looked out the window. The leaves on the trees were gently blowing in the breeze and birds flew past in search of their morning meal. The world had moved on without Collin, but she still hadn’t.  She felt the lonliness and longing that followed after each dream, but she also felt a calm peace inside of her as well. It was like a whisper telling her that this was the answer to her prayers. It was the only way that she would be able to see Collin again. She got up and started to get ready for work just like she always did, trying not to think about the bitter sweet dream.

Sometimes you can’t wait for people to say the things you need to hear. Sometimes you have to say them to yourself and be strong enough for that to be sufficient.

I’ve had the same basic dream multiple times.  In all 3 his death is intentional but I don’t know why he is suicidal.
 

DREAM 1

We are somewhere in the south. It seems like kind of a more poor area because sometimes there are shacks and people run around barefoot a lot. There is some sort of parade or event going on in town and everyone is really excited for it. We are trying to find Jonnie but no one seems to know where he is. I had seen him about an hour before wearing a white t-shirt and grey suit coat over light blue denim jeans and he had a top hat on. I’m not sure why. He seemed happy on the outside but in true Jonnie fashion his eyes seemed to have something bigger boiling deep inside. When a girl ran up to me and asked me where Jonnie was I just knew even though he hadn’t said where he was going. I ran to a black tree in the middle of an abandoned wheat field. I had to crawl under a barbed wire fence to get to the tree. It wasn’t a big tree. Maybe 12 feet tall. There were no leaves on it and it was black with thorns on it like the tree I had in my backyard when I was growing up. Jonnie was laying under the tree dead. Everyone else caught up to me and the girl that had asked where he was looked at him and started crying and then all of a sudden it flashed to us driving through town in a funeral procession and I woke up.
 
DREAM 2
 
Again the town event. Jonnie disappears. We go out to the woods to search for him and I see crows circling this spot in the field right above the tree. This time the tree was black and covered in thorns but it had white leaves. I don’t walk over there but in my head I think “I already know how this ends” and even though I don’t go look I know Jonnie is dead under the tree.
 
DREAM 3
 
Jonnie is obsessed with this tree but the thorns on it are poison. I see him right before the parade and I know he is thinking about touching the thorns. I look him dead in the eye and shake my head no. He knows what I mean by it. I get distracted and lose him. Someone asks me where he is and I get a vision of him touching the thorns. I know he is dead so I just start crying. Then I woke up.

I have no idea what any of these dreams mean so if someone who is good at dream interpretation wants to take a crack at it be my guest/

This may be the un-popular opinion but being single for Valentines Day doesn’t have to be a bad thing. We have been seeing a lot of posts about how you guys are going to be single (and depressed) for Valentines day, but don’t worry we wouldn’t leave you guys lonely and miserable. All the models submitted ideas that we complied into a list of things all you single peeps can do for Valentines Day this year. If that’s not enough you can always catch our belated Valentines Day Ustream and chat with us live

1        Splurge on yourself- Now that you don’t have to buy a gift for someone else on Valentines day you have money that you can spend on yourself. Buy something nice that you wouldn’t normally have money to get or spend the money pampering yourself with a mani, pedi, and massage. 

2 Have a girl’s night- Invite your single girl friends out to dinner and have a girl’s night or invite your friends to lunch since most couples Valentines plans are in the evening. You can also go bowling or go out dancing. Ber suggests karaoke (she’s addicted).

3 Flirt- Your single so you can flirt all you want. Go out with some other single friends and have fun flirting just because you can. Lot’s of people go out single on Valentines Day in hopes of meeting someone, use that to your advantage. If you are feeling really adventurous kiss a stranger and see what happens…. Just make sure he’s single first!

4 Have a cuddle party- I don’t know exactly when this trend started but I have started seeing more and more cuddle parties posted on social networking sites. Basically someone decides to host the party at their house and puts out an invite to friends to come over and watch movies and cuddle.

5 Ignore it- If worse comes to worse you can always hide your calendar, stay home, and just pretend it’s the same as any other day.

6 Hang out with people you love like your family- Watch movies, make dinner together, or just reminisce about the old times. Having fun with people you love is a great way to forget that you don’t have a significant other.

7 Host your own party- Invite all your single friends over for a party. Mix and mingle and by the end of the night you might not be single anymore.

8 Have some “me time”- Take a cooking class or paint something, whatever it is you have always wanted to do but just never had time for. If everyone else is busy for Valentines day they won’t be bugging you to do things for them so you will have that extra free time to do what you want. It’ll make you feel like you accomplished something and the day will be a good day.

9 Make some money off of it- All those people that are annoying you with their kisses and baby talk are about to make you some money. Capitalize off of couples and the holiday by using your talents to make yourself some extra cash. Make and sell Valentines or other crafty things for those that want the homemade look but don’t have the artistic ability to make them. Take photos for couples, teach dance lessons to guys that want to impress their girlfriends (tip you can learn some easy dance moves on youtube), draw portraits or caricatures of couples, sell flowers and balloon bouquets, offer advice like what they can get as a gift or where they can take their date, etc. make heart shaped sugar cookies and sell them, offer to deliver val-a-grams, and the best one of all make chocolate covered strawberries. We make them every year. They are a big hit and you can sell them for a ton!

10 Read a book- It’s a great way to take your mind off of everything and escape the real world for a little while.

11 Volunteer- Helping others always makes me feel better when I’m down. You can volunteer to walk the dogs at the animal shelter, call the nursing home ahead of time for a list of residents that rarely get mail or visitors and surprise them by bring them a card, make dinner for the families who have children in the hospital at the Ronald McDonald house….Valentines day is a celebration of love, not just the love between couples so show the people you love how much you care about them and spread that love to others. You’ll feel great.

12 Do a "secret santa" style gift exchange- Just like on christmas when you do put everyone's name into a bowl and draw out a name for secret santa you can do a secret cupid. Everyone who wants to participate (single or not) can put their name into the bowl. You can make valentines or exchange small gifts and candy for the person who's name you draw.

So there you have it. Now stop whining, get out there, and enjoy your Valentines Day