I’m just so stressed and annoyed lately. I feel like I am trying to make progress but I’m just spinning my wheels. As scary as it is I decided to cut out all the poison and negativity in my life. Toxic relationships, parasitic relationships and situations, medial things that I hate and that don’t better me in any way…. Stuff like that.

First I got rid of the stupid salon and I already feel a million times better. No more feeling like I have to choose between ethics or keeping my job and no more stupid rules. I got rid of a few other side projects I had going that just drained my time, energy and resources and the people involved never once showed any sign of loyalty or appreciation. Lost some “friends”.

I also cut off my safety nets. I love Untamed more than anything. It’s what I have done for years but I was so stuck in it I was forgetting how to do anything else. I think it makes me lazier and less creative to just always do what I’m good at…always doing what’s safe. So I cut that way WAY down for now. It was terrifying but Steve Jobs was right. You have to stay hungry, and stay foolish. I learn and grow more when I am being challenged. So to dump the restlessness I dumped everything I know. I got new hobbies, started working on new physical challenges in stunt class, got a new job I know nothing about, in an industry I know nothing about…

It’s hard but I like it. I don’t want things to be too easy. I like that I go to work and I don’t automatically do things second nature. I learn something new every single day and I have to work really hard. My body is exhausted and my brain is exhausted but I am happy J

I’m so annoyed at work that I can hardly stand being there anymore. They watch us on camera all the time like creepers and they nag us about the stupidest things and then they take all our money for naughty notes…ugh it’s so frustrating but I have been really trying to make it work. I’m not a quitter. Today may have been the last straw though! While I was gone for Playboy my boss jacked up all the prices at the salon. No warnings or anything, so I get back and everything is changed. When a customer asked me if we raised the price I said yes, because we had. As soon as she walked away my boss called. He had been listening on the audio and watching on camera. He told me to get the paper under the computer so I would know what to say to people. Naturally I looked under the monitor of the computer in front of me and he goes, “no the computer to your left. Do you see it under the monitor?” I picked it up and he says “yeah that one”. Ok I know they watch us and listen to us on cam all the time but it feels super creepy when you know they are doing it right then. So anyway, I read the paper and everything on it is a bold faced lie. It was a load of crap and he knew it so I said I wouldn’t tell customers that because I’m not going to lie to them. He wanted us to not saying anything about the price change but if customers brought it up we were supposed to tell them no we did not raise our prices….like they are too stupid to notice or something. Then if they are regulars and know they exact price (most are) or can read the signage with the old price that is right in front of their face, THEN we can admit the price went up but still have to lie as to why. One I don’t like lying to people and two I’m not going to lie about something so obviously wrong because I’m the one getting chewed out not him.

Then to top it off we think they have video cameras in the room. We tried to find them but as soon as we started looking guess who suddenly got fired? Technically I’m not fired. They just moved me to a sub list but they’ll never call so I’m not really sure what their reasoning is on that? Maybe so that I couldn’t draw unemployment if I wanted to? Idk I don’t really care. I’m already set up somewhere else. I move on quick